Jealousy

Jealousy
Jealousy can be a reason for lying. The root of jealousy often stems from psychological wounds and sometimes from a sense of incapacity. To combat jealousy, we must also address this sense of incapacity. There is a direct relationship between jealousy, sadness, and withdrawal into oneself. Overall, jealousy is nothing but a human emotion.

When a person is born, they have nine specific personality traits, which vary from person to person. Among these nine traits, jealousy can be found to varying degrees in different individuals.
Jealousy is more commonly seen in children from families where competition and comparison exist.

Types of Jealousy:

1)Resentment (Rashk): In this type of jealousy, called “resentment,” you are not bothered by seeing what others have that you do not. You may feel sad because you lack something, but you are not upset or hurt by the fact that others possess it.

This kind of jealousy is natural and almost everyone experiences it to some degree.

All humans need love, freedom, affection, admiration, and to be seen. If these needs are unmet, they may lead to disorders. So if someone has these qualities and we do not, we may feel resentment toward them.

2) Second type of jealousy:

In this type of jealousy, if someone else has something and we don’t, we suffer from not having it and it hits us hard, causing us emotional and psychological damage. We also wish that they didn’t have that thing or we wish that they would lose it too.

In this type of jealousy, people do not just wish they didn’t have it, they sometimes even plan to take away something that they don’t have and that someone else has, so that they don’t have it either.

The problem of the desire to destroy others out of jealousy occurs at a standstill between the ages of 3 and 5 in human childhood, meaning that the [mental] development process is severely halted between the ages of 3 and 5 and leads to a problem that carries its effects into adulthood and sometimes until the end of life.

Between the ages of 3 and 5, relationships are established between humans that the child observes. If, while observing those relationships, the child is unable to analyze, understand, and comprehend them, he or she will suffer from disorders.

When we deprive a child of healthy communication, or when a child is hurt and left out of the circle of communication for any reason, their development stops, and as a result, a foundation of destructive jealousy forms in them in later life.

Before age 3, the child is mostly focused on themselves and their mother (“I for my mother, mother for me”). Between ages 3 and 5, a new person (usually the father) enters the child’s life, creating a deeper emotional bond and experience of love for the father.
This forms the first emotional triangle in humans during this age. Imagine a pyramid diagram where the child is at the top, the father on one side, and the mother on the other. The child expects attention from both and wants them only for themselves. If the parents develop an intimate emotional connection and this connection excludes the child, causing feelings of emptiness, abandonment, or neglect, the child may develop emotional disturbances.

Malicious jealousy (type two) can only be treated with therapy over a long period. We must learn how to face and deal with these emotions.

Remember, emotions are like a herd of wild horses—they are untamed and pull you in all directions, eventually throwing you to the ground and trampling you beneath their hooves.

Plato also said about this: “We must tame these wild horses of emotion, then ride them. If one does not tame their multiple emotional horses, these wild horses will pull them wherever they want and finally throw them down, crushing their bones beneath their hooves.”