Throughout your life, you have likely interacted with stingy people. These individuals refrain from spending or using their resources. Stinginess has various forms, including: stinginess in financial matters, time, knowledge, and so on. A person who is stingy with money accumulates wealth but refuses to spend it. A person who is stingy with time spends very little time with their family and friends. A person who is stingy with knowledge avoids sharing what they know with others.
Causes of Stinginess
All these forms are types of stinginess that occur for two reasons.
First reason: Typically, the human brain undergoes a developmental leap between the ages of one and three, similar to a chick that grows feathers at a specific age and can begin to fly. If the chick doesn’t grow feathers during this sensitive period, it will never be able to fly. The human brain works in a similar way. Unfortunately, due to a lack of awareness and sufficient skills, some parents are unable to guide their children correctly during these sensitive years, which results in them not helping the child grow “feathers” but instead clipping the child’s wings with incorrect behaviors and flawed parenting methods. As a result, the child’s brain doesn’t develop the necessary scope and expansion, becoming limited to an issue imposed by the parents. In this case, the child’s freedom, autonomy, and functioning are stripped away.
For the reasons mentioned, children between the ages of one and three should be free and not be limited in order to allow their brains to develop the necessary scope and expansion. An important aspect of this period is allowing the child to feel free during bowel movements so that they do not feel restricted in their ability to urinate or defecate. Additionally, no feelings of weakness or guilt should be provoked in the child.
Parents should create conditions so that the child understands that the phenomenon of defecation is natural and normal. In other words, parents should make their defecation seem natural so that the child does not feel ashamed or guilty. The importance of this issue is that if Disturbance in the excretion processThe brain does not gain the necessary breadth, and one of the consequences of this is stinginess, because the brain, in a state of limitation, takes a defensive stance and tries not to lose anything and collects and keeps everything, such as holding feces and refusing to expel it. As a result, the person imagines that in the future he must collect everything, keep it, and not lose it.
Let’s explore a few examples of these individuals:
- People who, despite being full, do not stop eating because they believe that throwing away a few remaining bites would be wasteful.
- People whose refrigerators are filled with small amounts of various foods from several days ago.
- People who can afford to buy a high-quality car but prefer to drive an old, unsafe vehicle.
The brain of these individuals is self-restraining, and it is therefore very difficult to convince them that what they are doing is wrong or harmful to their health.
Second reason: Another important cause of stinginess is poverty and weak financial means, or the presence of wealth and financial security. Children who grow up in poor families and are constantly told to eat less, buy less, and wear less to avoid becoming poorer are more likely to develop stinginess in the future. On the other hand, wealthy families that constantly practice frugality to preserve their wealth also create the conditions for their child to develop stinginess.
Stingy individuals are like warehouse keepers. For a warehouse keeper, it doesn’t matter what valuable items and treasures are inside the warehouse; their job is to protect the warehouse, not to use its contents. For example, a person who has considerable wealth but chooses not to buy a car and instead walks everywhere.
Suggested article: Online psychologist
Characteristics of Stingy Individuals
- These individuals fear failure, the opinions of others, and self-expression. As a result, they constantly censor and limit themselves, which prevents them from achieving their goals.
- Another characteristic of these individuals is that they act with extreme caution. They do not take action easily and consider all possible aspects before making a decision.
- Even when they do make a decision and take action, they are constantly afraid of the consequences and outcomes. As this issue persists, they develop obsessive-compulsive personality traits.
- Stingy individuals feel uncomfortable when hosting guests, particularly when it comes to feeding and providing for them.
- Due to their stinginess, these individuals may avoid marriage or having children because they worry that their spouse or children will take some of their resources.
- Since they ignore their own needs and well-being, they often struggle to maintain healthy relationships. In fact, stinginess is one of the five negative traits to consider when choosing a partner.
- These individuals tend to have high levels of stress, which they often pass on to others, including their stinginess. In other words, one of the features of stinginess is its ability to spread to others.
Treatment of Stinginess
Treatment of Stinginess To treat these individuals, cognitive-behavioral techniques can be used. Through these techniques, their attention is drawn to the fact that they will eventually have to let go of everything they have accumulated, so it is better to make proper use of these resources now.
The next step in treating these individuals is to allow them to experience the pleasure of using their resources. These individuals tend to avoid enjoying what they have and delay this pleasure, just as they once delayed other natural actions in childhood. Stinginess is a severe psychological issue that can sometimes lead to physical harm as well. Therefore, treating it can help improve the quality of life for these individuals.